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It's just a page. Just a story, a few words connecting others to the characters. But that page was home, each and every word containing apart of her tragically beautiful story. Written by a person who didn't even know her, yet it flowed so easily. They understood her and her beating heart. With wide eyes and shaking hands she turned a page, hoping that her world didn't change. But it did and down the rabbit hole she goes. Hoping the demons won't reach her and her world won't change again. The authors of her stories taught that change is scary and you lose everything. And then it ends, the entire story just collapses, now she's not the character they made her. Just an abused withered out idea. All because her book ended.
So maybe that girl was you and maybe that girl was me. When I was moving I had to pack a lot things, but I made sure to keep my books.. Those stories helped me cling on to myself as it seemed that my whole world was changing. As my world started to spin the only still words were the ones I found in books. Alice always went down the rabbit hole. Harry always killed Voldemort. Bilbo always went with Gandalf. Everything always seem to turn our ok, except when it didn't (Allegiant) Those never changed, I could move away and those words will still be the same. It wasn't that I read because I didn't have anything to do but I needed comfort. If my brothers or sister were gone I found it nice to read any books I could get my hands on. I know that sounds quite nerdy but I really don't care. My name is Reede for goodness sake. I was meant to love books. Growing up an English teacher's daughter, books were everywhere. All the way from Shakespeare to Collins I could find and read. Every paper cut, late nights, and endings always seemed worth it to me.
It wasn't until late seventh grade did I realize that I could have as much fun as I did reading my books. Again back off I know I'm a nerd. Anyway, I dropped my books and started living. It was fun but I wasn't as comfortable. Not every place you go to is as welcoming as your bed. When I found out I was moving books kinda helped save me. Even though change can be good and all that. But I still needed those stable stories. The stories that I already knew weren't going to change. So again Alice went down the rabbit hole. Harry killed Voldemort once again. Bilbo went with Gandalf once more. My heroes always won. They didn't just end saving the day, they ended saving me. It wasn't that I was stranded, I just needed a little help finding my way. It's just a page. Just a story, a few words connecting others to the characters. It's just a book sorting pointless words together. But for her or for me, it was so much more than that.
It wasn't until late seventh grade did I realize that I could have as much fun as I did reading my books. Again back off I know I'm a nerd. Anyway, I dropped my books and started living. It was fun but I wasn't as comfortable. Not every place you go to is as welcoming as your bed. When I found out I was moving books kinda helped save me. Even though change can be good and all that. But I still needed those stable stories. The stories that I already knew weren't going to change. So again Alice went down the rabbit hole. Harry killed Voldemort once again. Bilbo went with Gandalf once more. My heroes always won. They didn't just end saving the day, they ended saving me. It wasn't that I was stranded, I just needed a little help finding my way. It's just a page. Just a story, a few words connecting others to the characters. It's just a book sorting pointless words together. But for her or for me, it was so much more than that.
1 comment:
This honestly feels like maybe it was written by me in another dimension because nothing could describe how I feel about books more. They definitely comforted me when I moved here, but even more when I moved to Canada, and I would sit outside in the withering cold with no friends, with just harry, ron and hermione to comfort me, or maybe katniss and peeta. I don't read as often as I used to, which is sad, but anytime I need to feel like I'm home, cause I don't know where home is anymore, I just grab one of my HP books that are literally falling apart, and just read.
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